We lost a TG giantess this morning. But we came here to celebrate her life, not to mourn!
Some would say, "You never go F to M!" or maybe the saying was, "You never go ass to mouth!" but either way, this caption went both ways, and I was happy to make it for the namesake of the Haven, the dear Rachel. Here's how she replied back in 2010: "Sooooo....ladies....anyone want to help me clean up? Thanks Dee! Not many people take the time to masculify me!"
She was very approachable, especially before she became sick a number of years ago, but not many really took her up on her friendliness. I got to know her fairly well before becoming an admin, and honestly, I'm not sure exactly why she was charmed enough with me to let me have a position of power, but just maybe, she figured it was easier to keep me behaving properly if I WAS inside the henhouse, instead of being the wolf outside of it. And honestly, that was the case. No one was going to fuck with MY friend's TG forum if *I* could help it.
And it was like that for some time, as we'd get hackers, spammers, religious freaks, et al. that tried to swat down the site on many occasions. But people like Courtney (the original, not Captisa) Bren, Playin Petra, Mistress Simone, and ShySteffie as my fellow admins among others .. all legends by the way in this girl's opinion .. kept the ship afloat with aplomb, style, and a hell of a lot of fun. Most of them left at some point, with 2 of them being harassed enough to have to leave unfortunately, but people like Jezebel and Kayla stepped up to the plate in these much less hectic times on the Haven. Much like the Simpsons, the Haven became an institution in the community, that outlasted many of the upstarts that came after.
If it sounds like I'm proud, you are damn right I am, and that is because Rachel stuck by the admins, the staff, and every single member that dropped in there and found themselves a home away from home so to speak. She touched so many lives, more than she could probably have imagined.
And it's a stupid ironic thing .. a genetic girl helps create a HAVEN for a bunch of guys (and some women too!) to live as their fantasy selves, in caption format, stories, and role play .. many of them who'd love to have been female (and we had many who did transition, or are in transition, including her boyfriend Miriam, known earlier as Emily) and she was struck down ultimately by ovarian cancer. I am pretty sure that I can say with authority that we are all in agreement with this statement, "FUCK CANCER!" I am sick of that scourge winning, time and time again.
Would I still have this blog and be a part of the TG community without Rachel? Probably .. but she gave me a forum, and the reach to bring whatever talents I have out to everyone, and the support and grace to give me the shot to make a difference in her playground .. and she was 24 when she started it. Don't ever say you are too young, or too old, to do something and make a difference. And she hadn't even reached 40 when she passed away.
It was a shame to see her decline, and I really couldn't deal that much with it, and I didn't keep up our friendship like I should have, but I like to think she knew that I, and all of us, still cared deeply and rooted for her to get better. Miriam and Rachel reached out to me when I lost my forever person last year, and it was touching that they still kept up enough to know what was going on in my life.
I could certainly go on more, but her legacy is still there on that website, and I'm hoping we can keep it going as a testament to her life. If you haven't been there in awhile, please do pop in and leave a message of condolence to Miriam, who I am sure is at peace, but still quite mournful of her long-time partner. Just know that her reach in this community is vast and as infinite as the universe.
RIP Rachel 1982-2021