Snakes? Why did it have to be snakes?
This caption was driven totally by the picture I found on line. The photo made me say "No time for love, Doctor Jones," and immediately I heard Sean Connery saying, "I named the DOG Indiana!"
Of course, Indiana is no name for a female, but Dakota is also a state and very much a girl's name, one that could be an adventurer of renown. In fleshing the story out somewhat, I just took a smattering of quotes from the movies, used some of the plot, then went slightly meta with the video game reference at the end. All in the name of some good old fashioned pop culture fun!
Yes, it is Short Round speaking in the beginning, and I think he's become her porter / driver(!) / assistant. I had a bit where her dad had read her diary which gave away the plan to turn into a female, but I cut it out as making it too long of a caption when I didn't want to wear out my welcome with too intricate of a plot for what is mostly a homage to a great trilogy of films from my childhood.
And yes, looking like that would be the HOLY GRAIL for many of my readers!